In response to questions, yes, I usually have my camera with me. It’s a choice I make because when I look through the tiny glass rectangle, frame in whatever love lays before me, set focus to that ordinary moment and capture it (sometimes well and sometimes not), it makes me present, hyper-aware of how amazingly stunning and inspiring our world is. My camera is a well-used tool, it grounds me solidly, electrifies my surroundings and seeks only beauty.
I use my camera as therapy. When faced with a toddler who dumps out my hard-earned, pumped milk so mom and dad can have their first date in seven months or a baby who just can’t settle into anything, my solution is ALWAYS to grab the camera and go for a walk.
^ Margot wasn’t ready for bed the other night so we put “Jimmy” in her sling to first walk her to sleep. ^
Sometimes the walk is smooth and we stride through our neighborhood with smiles, tossing daisies all the way to the park. Sometimes the walk is painful and we fight it at first, making it only a few feet and then sitting on the sidewalk to talk about bugs or dig in the front garden.
However it unfolds, it always works.
^ 5am wake up with my girls last Sunday. Everyone was fussy so we
went outside to pull the last of the radish and plant our leeks. ^
Getting out with a camera is our reset button.
I take photos and find joy in Margot’s slow, meandering shuffle, in Ruby’s asymmetrical ears, in the way the sun hits the tree tops, in our shadows. Margot finds joy in a whole world to be explored. And Ruby finds joy wherever we find it, especially if she’s on her mama.
nuggets.
:: We’re in it THICK with the peas. Oh the peas.
And I just adore how Ruby wraps her wee feet around me. Little primate.
Bug loves fresh vegetables. Except for carrots, she won’t eat out-of-season produce. Swear. I have to puree cauliflower and peas and bury it in cheesy noodles. But, interestingly, come garden season, she can’t get enough of the peas, radish, rhubarb (straight!), strawberries, spinach. It was the same way last year. Monkey knows good food.
:: A few days ago, Andy called from the living room, come here, babe! And I walked in to a standing, VERY pleased with herself Ruby. And, Margot who said, Look, mama, I can do it too!
:: Margot loves to help turn the compost.
And clean the coop.
:: Oh my I can’t dwell to much on this one. There was one last thing we had to do regarding Ruby’s health that I have been dragging my feet on: one more 24-hour holter to monitor her heart. When in the hospital last December, she kept triggering ventricular tachycardia which is some serious stuff (heart attack). It was never figured out…she clearly didn’t have a heart attack but she was having v tach…anyway, I had to get over my Ruby-doctor allergy and take her in to have wires glued to her torso one last time. We find out the good news that all is well some time next week.
:: We dance daily. I guess that’s our other reset button.
There’s not much a good ol’ booty shakin’ can’t fix.
:: In business news, the Sodastream winner:
Patty said…
I love your blog and would love to win your giveaway!! Such a cute video of Andy demonstrating…so cool that you could see all the bubbles coming from the glass and tickling Andy’s nose!!
I love your blog and would love to win your giveaway!! Such a cute video of Andy demonstrating…so cool that you could see all the bubbles coming from the glass and tickling Andy’s nose!!
Congrats! E mail me at [email protected].
Also, I have another product review coming up from CSN Stores. They have all manner of goods from twin beds to espresso machines. I am excited with what they are sending me (and my bug will be even more thrilled!).
:: Lots of backyard sipping and dining lately.
:: And roaring contests.
:: And morning breakfast dates with friends.
:: Letting go when your kid insists on wearing only the fishy bathing suit, froggy boots and green hat! even though it’s really cold outside.
:: Mourning the loss of some potato plants and hoping like hell that the others won’t die off.
^ I thought it was blight at first but the soggy stem makes me think it’s bacterial wilt. ^
At least there were some itty taters under those sick plants. Perfect for Ruby.
:: And, this. This is when I choose to find beauty. Because *sometimes* I am about to lose it. Like when I pick up the whole house and, as I mentioned (but it’s worth rementioning!), pumped milk for Ruby and Margot manages to dump clothes out of a laundry basket, fill it with toys and pour my milk on the rug in 37 seconds flat.
I took a deep breath, forgave my curious daughter and took a sweet photo of Margot with her prized possessions in a laundry basket.
I was so upset about the milk. I nearly cried. I surprised myself. I think I hate pumping because I had to pump for those two horrid weeks when Ruby was hospitalized. I grew to hate the whop whir of that machine. To hate that it meant my baby was too weak to eat.
But I have to remember that THIS is where we are NOW:
:: Waiting for papa to get home from work.
:: So that we could go on a date. As in, leave both children with a babysitter and leave the house holding only each other’s hands.
A date.
We biked downtown, ate a fabulous meal, dreamed of summer plans to camp, bike, run, swim and GO ON MORE DATES.
30 Comments
This was beautiful, as are so many of your blog entries! Thank you for reminding me to keep looking for the beauty in chaos and imperfection. My photography skills are nowhere near yours, but using a camera for therapy sounds like a wonderful idea.
I agree with Ashley, beauty in the chaos, but not easy to find sometimes. You have captured Margot and Ruby and your life together at home very well, in pictures and comments. Good job Nici. Love the kissing ice cream cones. Bet Andy’s is the one with the least ice cream. Yes to more dates. Let us all know when you hear that Ruby is as healthy as she certainly looks. Standing? Soon we will see her pushing that coffee table around just like Margot did. Look out Alice.
What a beautiful blog post! Think the camera needs to come with me and the dog on our walk this morning….
and “There’s not much a good ol’ booty shakin’ can’t fix” is the best line I have read in a long time..
hope you have a lovely sunny week
i LOVE the ROARING contest. I wish I had a copy of that picture. It makes me so happy! and I love that Margot Bea wheres her bathing suit and rocks those green frog boots! Miss those babies so much. wishing you lots and lots of good energy/luck/thoughts/positivity with Rhubarb’s test results. I know everything will work out great. she is a healthy smiley bb. and sorry about the milk. i totally get it. not awesome but you’re amazingly patient with your children. i witnessed it myself. i will strive to emulate.
Miss you. XO
wheres? wears…
Can’t wait to hear that Ruby’s tests come back “all is well”.
wow Nici…I love this part about your date with Andy… “As in, leave both children with a babysitter and leave the house holding only each other’s hands.” Such a good reminder of how important it is to nurture your relationship with your partner too!
As always, just great, simple, spare writing about life, with the added plumpness of pictures to show how it all goes down. I read every post, but don’t comment a lot, because, well, they’d all read like this.
I am not overly fond of kids in general, but read your blog because you are so intentional but honest about what you do.
“There’s not much a good ol’ booty shakin’ can’t fix.” I think this just became my new mantra !!!! Thanks for the inspiration……
loved this. 🙂
recently invested in a nicer camera and it’s with me constantly, too.
yay for date nights!
-your girls are so sweet
-love all of your photos
-so sorry about your milk being dumped, I know how that feels. I’ve spilled a bottle myself.
-looking forward to you getting good news about Ruby’s test too. My baby Vivian has a vsd (hole between lower chambers) so I know how scary heart stuff can be. We’re hoping hers will close up on its own.
-love Ruby’s name. My Vivi was almost a Ruby 🙂
I MUST have a compost-turning outfit like that. Anything can be done better when it’s done with STYLE!
Peaked….I am in love with my girls!
I’ll be back……xoxo, Mom/Gram
Great nugget this week.
1) I love the roaring…
2) I love little naked bums in summer (key word is little). Alex is 2 and nakedness is a daily reality….just like potty accidents.
3) Cheers to hating the pump – reminded me that I had to work and couldn’t be with my child; but it was worth the hassle in the long run. Glad to know that Ruby is thriving…unlike your potatoes!
4) I love, love, love the ergo, and I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who gardens with it (mine is dirt brown on purpose!). I still carry Alex for “back pack rides” even though she’s 33 pounds.
5) Sometimes I find myself “booty shaking” or just standing in constant motion while at the post office or at the bank by myself. Babies bring out the rhythm in all of us!
6) Would you be willing to give out your Mojito recipe? I’m jonesing for a good one.
Cheers and happy gardening and happy hand-holding.
-Jennifer
Thank You! I don’t often comment, I always read, you (along with Kelle Hampton) help me remember to love everything about my littles, including the fact that sometimes they do unlovable things, glad I am not the only one that sometimes starts a walk badly, but they always end happily…..you inspire.
Love the little band aid on that little cubby leg..and naked roaring contests are the best. I love the part about what Margot is capable of in 37 seconds flat…they are amazingly quick arent they?! I find too if I snap a pic it gives me the space I need to smile and see the beauty of it all.
:)Lisa
holy beautiful post! love the nakey bum pictures, margot’s chic outfit, the waiting for daddy shot -oh the shadow pic, too! okay, i’ll stop there. this post has some really wonderful pictures!
i, too, use my camera as therapy 🙂
ps – what kind of camera do you use? have you mentioned it before? if so, it’s slipped from my memory.
adore the pic of my little soli! that so captures my adoration of him! thanks so much for being so dang talented. and thanks for reminding me that toddlers don’t mean any harm (especially the extra expressive and curious ones…)
love that we’ve had all this time together lately…
Love Rubes standing! As always, all of the pictures are a delight but I am especially fond of fishy suit, froggie boots and green chapeau. Bug is becoming a regular Coco Chanel!
Super good post nici! Love the ice cream cones, and naked little booties. On the other hand, yesterday my 6 year old son was dressed in his sister’s undies and pink leotard, that was pretty cute too 🙂 Love your words of inspiration. And Margot in her bathing suit, and boots and hat. k, love them all.
Stumbled across your blog awhile ago.. Love it.. Every picture and every word… This was an awesome post and I just had to comment! Love your little compost turner!! This is our first year of having a garden so I find your pictures very inspiring! I SO know the feeling of pumped milk being lost… 🙁 Sometimes I think that the person who said “No use crying over spilled milk” didn’t realize that it was a Momma crying over spilled breastmilk!! 🙂 My little ones are around the same age as your girls (Jan 08 & Dec 09) so I love seeing what you’re doing with your girls (especially when it comes to keeping your sanity!!! 🙂 )
Yay for fresh veggies, a healthy babe, too-cool-for-school gal, and more dates!
xoxo
Pumping sucks!!! Each spilled drop is painful, an entire bottle is truely tragic.
Hump day nuggets are always such an inspiration ~ I love visiting here every time. :>) You look great always – even when mucking out the chicken coop!! I have some rather unattractive pictures of me doing the same – I think I now need to rethink my outfit (currently rain boots and workout shorts with a sleeveless tank).
Awesome post as usual! Hearts from Northern Calif. ~ Conny
Oh, I miss you. I wish so badly I could knock on your door, walk into that breezy bright living room of yours, let you make me a very dirty, very strong martini and talk. laugh. cry. hug. This post was beautiful. And I’m shaking my head in that first part whispering “yes, yes, oh yes…”
Thank you, Friend. Thank you for talking past your minute allowance this month. Thank you for loving. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for posting pictures of Ruby standing up, with her band-aided thigh and Margot hugging Jimmy. Thank you for enjoying the shit out of the small things with me, Friend. We only got four minutes to save the world. You with me?
xoxo I know you are.
I could. not. agree more. I recently told a friend who keeps asking me “how are you so happy?” to go buy a cheap digital camera and take at least one photo every day of something she finds inspiring/beautiful/intriguing. Not sure if she took my advice, but I sure hope she does.
ps – your date night cuisine looks super delish and lovely!
Conny: I think your coop cleaning outfit sounds hot.
Angie: Totally! That expression must come from mama’s spilling breast milk. Perhaps not worth crying over but, holy hell, it sucks.
Domestic Diva: I use a Canon Rebel XT. More info here
Judy: I always love when you pop in.
Daniel: Margot was almost Vivian!
Lois: I like “wheres”
The Margot, Vivian, Ruby connection…love it! 😉
i guard pumped milk with some crazy-woman part of me. serious liquid gold.
and the pump. ugh – shudder thinking about it. i dispise that thing. but … if it meant yum dinners out. might be more worth it.
things always look brighter after seeing them through the camera.
beautiful and inspiring blog!! thanks for sharing ;0)
by the way, what camera do you shoot with?
heidi ;0)