Margot’s outfit kills me! It is so dang perfect! The rainbow, the scrunchy green leggings, the wings! So dang adorable. Ruby is the cutest tomato I’ve ever seen too. Can you believe our little November babies will be one this month?! (my guy was born Nov. 24th)

Jessica

LOVE Margot’s outfit…you did it! Just like the photo! And Ruby is so cute as a little tomato. You’re so right-holidays are much more exciting through the eyes of a child.

I got to prance around our new neighborhood with Cinderella and her slippers that were too big so they kept falling off and she loved it because it was just like the movie.

And I love Santa more now as a Mom that I did when I was a kid.

I really love that Margot saw her vision through to the end. That is so great! 🙂 And what a cute little tomatoe! Your mamadigs made me a tear up a little….poor pups…mine is currently going through the same thing. But they love us so much regardless…that’s what is so amazing about them!
xo
Kris

I feel exactly the same about x-mas, the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny (and with the Waldorf festivals, there are even more of those guys… the fairies, St. Nick, etc.).

Just like you, I was DEVASTATED when I found out and that’s the last thing I wish for my girls… At the same time, I didn’t want to deprive them of the pleasure of the magic associated with those festivals and with expecting the surprise from the fairies, santa, etc.

What I find helpful is that with time, I give them hints that I work with the fairies (we even have an Halloween fairies that bring the costumes as a surprise here) and this year, they noticed that the fairy used some of the things we already had and I told them I helped her… I am starting to tone it down a bit about Santa too (he only fills the stocking here)… It’s a really hard one, and there is no easy solution (I have friends who are doing it the non-magical way, telling their kids there is no Santa, etc. but those kids so desperately want to believe they existe, they come up will all sorts of discourse to convince their parents that they are wrong)…

Anyways, I love the beet outfit!!

I’m so glad to hear you talk about your dog! We don’t have kids yet, but we Love our dog with complete and utter abandon! He is just the absolute most wonderful creature ever created. Seriously. So, we constantly scratch our heads and think, “how could we ever love a baby as much as we love Jackie?” And, I mean, I’m a rational person and I know that we WILL love a baby as much as we love (or more than we love?) Jackie– I just really can’t comprehend it. My heart would explode, right?

How awesome for a child to create a sketch and have her parents help make it a reality. A truly wonderful gift.

Nici,

I also was DEVASTATED when I found out about Santa and all the other fantastical awesome creatures that exist in spirit but not in body…I was 9.

My Mom was putting curlers in her hair in her bathroom off of her bedroom. I was sitting on her waterbed talking to her through the open door. “Mom, kids at school are saying Santa’s not real. He’s real, right?”

She started to explain how I had to believe and how she is an adult and she still believes. Even at a young age, I realized how her answer was true and beautiful but how she also skirted around my question. So I asked her again, “But, Mom…I know all that…But, is Santa a real person like you and me?”

She said, “Well, Santa is real in spirit. He is part of the Christmas spirit that makes us want to do all the special Christmas things like decorating the tree and baking Christmas cookies and singing Christmas carols…” And although, now, as an adult, I am in awe of how beautiful her answer is and how she didn’t admit defeat… I then burst into tears, accused her of lying to me (“like you say I shouldn’t do to you”), and remember being so MAD that everyone came together to play a trick on me.

My Mom was great; she stopped what she was doing, came over to me half-curled, held me, and asked me to listen to her as she tried to explain and re-explain how no one was trying to trick me…

I remember being upset for days, even longer, and how the truth would come to me slowly and how I would check each revelation with my Mom… Just like you, I asked her about the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and so on… Then I asked her the logistics of how the presents get under the tree that weren’t there before…

There were so many unanswered questions and as I asked my Mom for each of the details, I would just need to LOOK at her to see if what I was saying was true…

I definately did not react well and also, have not met anyone else that reacted like myself… until now.

Thank you for sharing and thank you for your writing… it is truly beautiful. Why do you think we reacted this way while others do not? It is so interested to think about…

Much Love, Val-Marie

I was devastated too about finding out about Santa…. But, even more devastated when my daughter found out at age 9. I cried so hard. She handled it so well, but I also let her figure it out. I was most upset that it was another piece of innocence going away.

But, the message of Santa lives strong! It is fun to give presents incognito.

Margot’s costume materialized just magnificently! Ruby is the cutest tomato I have ever seen!

Oh I remember finding out about SC!! It was the Christmas your mom made all the cousins matching P.J.’s! We had it at gradma and grandpa’s house–the yellow one-just out of Big Fork. Anyway–before we left for the drive up from Red Lodge, my parents had “Santa” call us and say he was going to bring our presents early (the would not fit in the car) ! Anyway- really thought–wow, what a great guy!! But, my parents thought that I did not believe it and sat me down and told me the “truth”!! I was devistated! Yes, I think they told me too soon. I was not ready to let go of the wonder of Santa!! So, that Christmas with all of us together and my cousins all writing letter, drawing pictures, leaving out cookies and carrots for Santa–was really horrible for me. I remember crying down in their basement. Luckily, Ginny and Laura confided in me that they knew the “truth” too! I felt a wee bit better, but still bitter toward my parents. They should have trusted in my childhood wonder just a little bit longer. I of couse, have since forgiven them! But, with the world so full of things that are not so nice, I will hold on to my children’s excitment and love for those “mysteries”-as long as they allow-the fuzzy bunny whom hides eggs, the magical fairy whom for some reason wants to collect teeth and leave a few coins, and that jolly old fellow that flies around the sky with reindeer!! You know- I do beleive in Santa again! He is alive and well in my child’s eyes, and I love it!!
PS-Lets make all the second cousins matching Christmas P.J.’s!!!
Love you
pcpEB

Love Margot’s costume, and Ruby…beyond adorable. 🙂

I feel like I go on and on about how special it is to be a parent during holidays, but it’s so true. The sweetness we get through our little ones during these extra special times is a true blessing.

Nici, Although I don’t comment often, I religiously follow your insightful and thought provoking writings and photos. Your wonderful costumes reminded me how I loved making them each year and how I miss that fall ritual now that my little is nearly 22!
I was also reminded that she loves to tell us how she pretended to believe for several years after recognizing our handwriting on the notes from “Santa”. I had been sooo careful to wrap in different paper, etc. but had no idea she would recognize handwriting! (she must have been about five.) She worried that the ritual would change if she admitted that she was hip to the trip so she played along until she was about 10. I was shocked when she admitted this as a teenager. I had to laugh but was touched that she loved the ritual, spectacle and, I suspect, how much it meant to us. Santa still fills all of our stockings (even Daisy, the dog’s) but he no longer leaves a written message.

Margot’s creativity simply astonishes me. How ridiculously amazing is she?! Her costume is totally fantastic! And kudos to you for making it happen for her. What a wicked Mama!

And Ruby is one sweet little tomato. 😉

Love the piece about Alice. Thankful for dogs.

So cute. To tell you the truth, I studied your picture for a long time before going on and reading the caption. Whew, I was thinking, woman, you really need to tame that hair! Beets, makes sense now.

I love Margot’s vision and costume. My almost-3-year old was hell bent on being a rock…so a rock she was, as proud as can be. Loved it!

What you said about Alice is so sweet,so true. We had 2 labs when Lucy was born. The older, my sweet 13 year old lab, died a bit over a year ago. I’ve been racked with guilt about putting her on the back burner during her last years. Breaks my heart. And, I still haven’t gotten back to it with the younger lab (she is 6). So much to juggle….dogs, jobs, dissertations, businesses, chickens, gardens, parenting…and the guilt. Ugh.
Now, I think I’ll go walk my crazy dog in the pouring rain. She’ll love it. =)

Caroline is so right….dogs do know love! I know you remember your love for Woofer and his for you. He simply was THE BEST!! As you know, in your lifetime, I have adopted/rescued 4 dogs ALL of them look at me with adoring eyes, they know when I am happy, sad, ill, worried and content..they know, they care & they love unconditionally. The love I have for my children & grandchildren is the strongest love I have ever felt, The love for my dogs is the strongest love I have ever felt for 4-legged animals, Alice knows this about me too! Gotta’ go, three pups want their breakfast!

Love you! xo

oh I love it, and I’m not really even a dog person!

Oh how I LOVE how you made Margot’s design come to life… well done Mama!
And your mamadigs this week made my eyes leak… our big ol’ black lab Dewey was our first baby… now with two monster-boys in the house he definitely gets put on the back burner far too often.
We adopted him from the spca 8 years ago when he was 1-1/2. Watching the gray hairs take over his soft chin & underbelly makes me nostalgic for the simple days of just me & him. But then again, although he doesn’t get to be the main event very often, there are now two sets of little arms who are more willing to throw his ball (in the living room of course) over and over and over again.
Time to get off the computer & go walk my first baby!
xo
Kate
p.s. Love that my word verification is furganag. 🙂

,,,i love that you made margot’s costume idea come to life,,,what i love most is that you’re not the mother to talk her child out of the vision to be a chicken, duck, frog, rainbow for the likes of a princess costume,,,and ruby has to be the cutest tomato i’ve ever seen,,,

Yes, yes, ride the wave. Let go, let live, let be, let love…and it will all fall into place and however you do it will be just fine because to thine own self be true, eh?

With your brilliant creativity on beets and frog-duck-rainbows, I imagine you will find some perfect blend of truth and magic that will both keep you from feeling like you’re lying to your kid and yet still stir the pot of wonder that will make for pretty little Margot/Ruby memories.

If you want help with the lying in the meantime, I’m here for ya. Santa’s my man.

But enough about that.
Beet Queen? Love. As well as rainbow ducks and tomatoes and that glorious yellow tree in that first picture.

And so, so, so, so love that I’ve BEEN THERE. I know that place and those loves and that dog and those smiles.

xoxo Half Full, mutha.

I absolutely loved believing in Santa and I feel you with the Santa’s-not-real-devastation thing. I found out first about the Easter bunny (super vivid memory) and the bunny’s colleagues died that night too.
I actually think it was really formative to have a belief I was so emotionally invested in revealed to be a fabrication. That experience to this day helps me to be more sensitive to and aware of the passion and emotion which can be tied to an individual’s understanding of reality. It’s a good reminder to me not to try to foist my version of reality off on others too much as 1) it might not be worth the distress it could cause them if I’m successful and 2) I might be the one who’s wrong.

LOVE these Halloween photos! Margot’s imagination is truly captured….AND sweet little Ruby, Tomato Pie! Great job!

Oh my sweet Burb~we have talked about this so many times, but…I am SO sorry you were devastated about the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy & Santa all in one blow…maybe I made them all too real, not sure if I would have changed anything tho’…. I still believe in the magic! 🙂

God I remember that Easter like it was yesterday, actually we were coloring eggs on Easter eve when the truth came out ABOUT EVERYTHING!!! It was a painful journey, I wished you had not asked the questions and I wish I would not have answered them so honestly. BUT damn you were smart!

I know you will take some of our traditions, add to them and create new ones! I look forward to seeing it all unfold in Margot & Ruby….love you TONS!

xoxo, me

ps…time to dust off The Polar Express!

pss….hard to ‘beet’ your costume 🙂

I still love believing in Santa! To this day my husband and I talk tongue in cheek about what Santa is going to get us this year. I love the magic and wonder of it all! I was 6 when I caught my mom and dad putting presents under the tree but my mom insisted that Santa was real with a twinkle in her eye that, even at that tender young age, convinced me that reality is just a mater of perspective. Santa is as real as all the magic and wonder of the every day. I’m so glad for him!

man, the last line of “Alice.” Love.

I know that kind of love for one’s dogs. My two pipsqueaks are my kids. 🙂

(sob)!!! This is exactly how I feel about my two dogs…so much annoyance, so much guilt…but alwaysalways so much love! Thank you for letting me know I am not the only mama that feels this way!

this post speaks so true to me and my dog brewsky.. oh brewsky how my patience with you has grown thin because my energy is drawn to my 9 month old daughter.. but your there by my side each and everyday ..

i so needed this.. to refresh my mind with how much I do (& did) love my doggie boy.. and how much my girl loves him too

Thanks for this! It brings a tear to my eye…we have four furry friends and a 15 month old and I too often hear myself thinking the very same!

Oh you are NOT alone! I, too, feel the same about mythical characters such as Santa, the Tooth Fairy, etc. Instead, our family focuses on celebrating holidays that mean more to us. The book “Earthways” by Carol Petrash gives us many good ideas!

I’ve always toned down Christmas but this year is the first year that I truly felt conflicted celebrating something just because everyone else does. So we are going to be celebrating Winter Solstice instead (the book above has many cool traditions for this holiday). Of course, we have family who are Christian and will celebrate Christmas with them. I feel good about this decision because many of the Christmas stuff come from Pagan beliefs: tree, wreath and all are part of Solstice! =)

We haven’t had a lost tooth yet and I’m struggling for ideas on this. It’s tough because my son reads books and sees on TV about this mythical creature but so far we haven’t played up on the Tooth Fairy idea. We do want to give him money for his teeth but not sure how to go about with it. Alternatives, anyone?

I ADORE the beet queen… I think there should be nothing desperate about it! It’s clear where your daughter gets her creativity!! I never believed in Santa, fairies and the like as a child, and I guess it’s genetic, because my son will have nothing to do with it. We have the opposite problem, at 4 and 5, having to remind HIM that other kids don’t know Santa isn’t real, and that he should be careful what he says… I am glad I never got into that game as a kid. I’ve always appreciated reality. Reality is special enough, if you ask me. I like to focus on the fact that santa is a good story, and we can learn a lot from a story about an old man who is so giving, and then go be giving people ourselves. That way, the tradition isn’t about “getting.” Just my thoughts…
As for doggies post babies… they do take a tough rap, eh? We tried our very best to keep our dog as a major part of the family, especially when we saw how many other dogs were no longer allowed inside, or even in the car… he died this summer, and that made me so grateful that we cherished him for the few years we had him (he was only 6) – he was great with our baby and he’ll always be our first born!

,,,triple love your costume “queen beet”,,,when you mentioned in a former post that you thought the “beets” would make a lovely bouquet for a bride i thought, “yes, indeed they would and i want to be the first bride that carries that lovely beet bouquet”,,,that “day” might be around the corner, so don’t “pickle” all those beets, I might need to borrow a few of those raw beauties,,,(smile)

Yeah I’m going to have to agree with everyone else and say that M’s costume is stunning. You’re a good mama letting her follow her vision. I wanted to be a Posted sign (no hunting, fishing, trapping…) when I was in 4th grade, and so I was! I love how delighted and supportive you are of your daughters creativity!

xox
Melina
http://www.thewildercoast.com

I just LOVe that you let her be WHO she wanted to be! how awesome! perfect mother for 2 little girls, give them confidence in who they are, way to go!!!
I have 2 daughters also!
I adore your blog!
tara
[email protected]

wow, you got me. i’m sitting hear with tears dripping down my face. i don’t know how many times i said the same thing about my stella “how could i love a child any more than i love her?” she was, and always will be, my first born. we were the most proud and doting parents to her. i had to hold back tears at the vet multiple times and whisper to myself to “get it together” over and over. i even bought a rocker for the nursery that came with an ottoman because i just had to have somewhere for her to lay down with me when i was with the baby. no exceptions. of course she took a bit of a backseat after sylvia came but the two of them quickly became great friends and my love and pride in her only grew. i used to tell her to never leave me because i just didn’t know what i would do without her. and then she was gone…..ripped away from us by an extremely rare and misdiagnosed staph infection 3 weeks before the birth of my son. it’s been over a year and i still think of her and miss her EVERY day. my daughter talks about her almost every day. i pray that in some way she will remember her. give alice an extra kiss for me today.

Your girls are so lucky to have the creative and inspired mama that you are. Well-done, Nici.

aw, this is absolutely precious. i got a little teary-eyed. i have been a creeper on your blog and your posts on here for several months and finally decided to just lay it out there. you are amazing. i love you writings. they make me rethink how i am doing as a mother, wife and person in general. thank you so much for sharing all of your pain, happiness and accomplishments. it means alot to me to know that others go through things and deal with things in their own ways and there is not always one way to heal.

thank you so much. much love*

Yah. I’m wicked impressed that you made that Halloween vision come to life. WOW.

And it looks GREAT! She must have been in seventh heaven. I imagine that this memory, of seeing her vision come to life, will trump any trauma from finding out Santa doesn’t exist.

Oh my gosh, I sooo needed to read this. I am having the same guilt with my first “child,” Henry. I never thought I could love something as much as him, but now that I have a baby girl, he is def. on the back burner, and I get so annoyed with him constantly licking and tripping over me. I think I need to write him a “letter” and maybe that will help me get some of these thoughts out so I can share the same “exhale.” Thank you! PS-I quoted you again in my post about thirteen year-old insecurities. I LOVED your post “Let’s Hike.” I think it’s a must read for all women!